What I learned in my 38 years ...

Thursday, January 30, 2014

  1. that you should always end a conversation with I Love You - and yes sometimes that even means the local grocery store cashier, though she might wonder about you and call the police as a safety measure.
  2. never be the first to end a hug - especially when it comes to your children - let's just say my teen thoroughly enjoys this.
  3. you can't ever dream too big - even if that dream seems out of reach - just go for it!!
  4. that adding Hershey's chocolate syrup to a hot cocoa mix is what all the cool kids are doing.
  5. that before making the decision to yell at the top of your lungs at a football game, you better know what the flip you are talking about.
  6. that whoever said raising a teen was going to be my biggest challenge, must not have had to help their child with the 12 step regrouping math problem from the common core curriculum.
  7. I believe I might have finally figured out what I want to be when I grow up.
  8. that sometimes when you sip on a margarita and a coffee all day at a crop you will get confused as to which one is buzzing you.
  9. that sometimes it is okay if you don't get out of bed on the weekends to feed your children - eventually they will learn to fend for themselves - that is if you call oreos, ramen noodles and ritz crackers nutritional.
  10. that my words sting far worse than my fist.
  11. reverse psychology doesn't work on your kids or DOES IT?
  12. yelling louder doesn't make my children hear me any better - I think I am out of their decibel range - at some point I mute out on them and they just tilt their heads sideways in confusion.
  13. money is the root of all evil - it teases me in my bank account on Friday and then disappears on Saturday.
  14. putting down your guard can open your heart to beautiful things.
  15. that all the baggage I come with doesn't cost me extra at the airport.
  16. the grass is only greener on the other side b/c it is full of shit.
  17. home is not defined by walls, brick, mortar, a roof and floor - it is built on trust, surrounded by love, sustained by loyalty and topped off with a little kindness.
  18. the key to a great marriage is just putting up with his farts - if you can handle that stank you can just about handle the economic crisis.
  19. if you want a man's attention, put the vjayjay on lockdown and see those ears perk up.
  20. dragging your kids across linoleum will not hurt them.
  21. children can teach you some incredible things, listen to them once in awhile.
  22. you can be your worst critic, but throw a couple of constructive criticisms your way.
  23. if you can't find it some search engine will, but it will under no circumstances find the missing socks.
  24. for whatever reason - none of them did it, none of them so don't even ask, they will say they didn't.
  25. what I once mistakened for blatant prejudice I now recognize as ignorance.
  26. the smallest things become impossible when we are filled with self-doubt.
  27. the dishes and laundry can wait, Lord knows they are there every day anyway. bleh!
  28. take the time to pat yourself on the back and give credit where it is due during those proud mommy moments.
  29. life just seems to fly by faster the older we get.
  30. watching Ellen brings me joy and hope for the world.
  31. that my minivan does not define who I am.
  32. that the window of opportunity is now a hurricane term that will join the others like hunker down.
  33. for some reason I don't curse at Disney.
  34. running to the mailbox is not as fun as it used to be as a kid.
  35. that the reason you forget the pain of labor is b/c now they are a pain in your ass.
  36. my husband was so worth the broken journey I traveled to get to him.
  37. my children are indeed my greatest accomplishments and remind me daily.
  38. God created you for a purpose, he indeed put you on the face of the earth for something.  No role is too small.
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